"The Big Night in Toberkeigh"
A varied programme there will be
On this great night in Toberkeigh
In speech and song, by young and old
The heartfelt welcome will be told
Those words upon your tickets plain
The reason why you came explain
In car, on bikes, from far and near
You've come in hundreds to be here
The Church is packed from door to door
Until the pews will hold no more
A pity, friends, you can't all stay
To pack it out each Sabbath Day!
Now, Mr. Thompson*, this great band
Comes from each corner of our land
Some husbands left their wives so dear
And others slipped out when the coast was clear
They've come from Whitepark's golden strand
From Ballinlea with its great pipe band
From Mosside, too, with its lights so bright
That the people can't sleep in their beds at night
They've left their hens in their litter deep
They've left the sow and the pigs asleep
They've left the cow with the crumpled horn
There's some of us won't be home till morn
Then, Mr. Thompson, need I say
That I'm glad to see you here today
And others, Sir, will follow suit
To welcome you into the Route
But perhaps before I leave and go
I'll mention what you ought to know
Now some advice I'd like to give
About this place where you're going to live
Your health card give to Dr. McVicker
There's none will make you better quicker
His bottles are such lovely colours
His pills far stronger than any others
We're glad that you've bespoke a wife
For bachelors live a lonely life
And soon you'll say of Toberkeigh
"'Tis the wife who runs this house, not me!"
Then Duncan Gault will keep you right
He'll see the fire and lamps are bright
Alex. Stewart will provide the money
You're wife'll say, "Hand it over, honey!"
The Session Clerk's McConaghie
A decent man as you can see
I'll not name all the rest, but, oagh!
There's Henry McIntyre frae Croagh
The Secretary's our friend John Moore
He was lifting tickets at the door
His job upon Committee night
To keep the minutes he must write
The choir they sing both loud and clear
Miss Huey trains them, so we hear
I'm sure with me you will agree
They are a handsome lot to see
Now I will close this simple ditty
For it is longer than it's witty
And find a seat upon the floor
To listen and to say no more.
John C. Faulkner**
* Rev Cowan Gamble Thompson was installed on the 10th November 1953
** Rev Faulkner was the Croaghmore minister
